bottled up thoughts in maroon and yellow: Empty, standing from your point

There’s a nagging doubt within me, whether I really want it. I just don’t want to face reality. Everything is a matter of timing, and recently things just ain’t working out for me. My clock is 12 mins early, and no matter what I do I just can’t turn it back. I guess I’m upset with what’s been going on- it’s like an emotional rollercoaster. I’m sick, down with a swollen eye, been bulging, wasting time, not meeting any goals I want, been on a conquest for something I have found out ain’t what I really want, lost friends, reputation, religion. I need God yet I refuse to take responsibility, he took away consequence for me, yet I’m unwilling to make the big sacrifice and that is to do the right thing. What happen to sunshine I ask myself, when it’s staring at me in the face. I have to take those shades off my eyes. Pick myself up again, learn to walk.